January 2011
59 posts
PUNNY JOKE DAY!
bestrooftalkever:
#1
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
#2
I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.
#3
I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.
#4
I am reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
#5
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
I only think about food.
In reference to getting dessert with multiple friends.
Ridhi: man
i hate sharing
me: who said you have to?
none of us are going to judge if you want your own fondue
i will make jokes though
Ridhi: no
not that
SHARE YOU
WHORE
me: oh.
So Dev, tell me a story.
Dev: hmm.
once upon a time...
the end.
me: lame
Dev: okay okay
A long long time ago
in a galaxy far far away
....
some stuff happened
space battles and such
light sabers, aliens, the whole deal
it was pretty cool.
me: you suck at this.
A1 for Waffles
Mom: Do you want waffles or muffins for breakfast? Just text “A1” for waffles or “B1” for muffins.
Me: Why did you go through all that trouble? Why can’t I just text “waffles” or “muffins”?
Mom: We are texting in code! ;););) :)
Me: Waffles
Mom: A1 or B1?
Me: WAFFLES
Mom: Sooo…A1?
Me: Mom. Yes.
Mom: I think I would rather have muffins. I’m making muffins
Daisy crosses the Pond by Monica
me: monica, tell me a story
Monica: um
okay
once upon a time
there was a sunflower
named
daisy
and it was ironic because
she was actually adopted by daisies
and she lived in a meadow
full of daisies
and she was the only sunflower
who lived in the meadow
with literally hundreds of daisies
so one day
she was wondering
to herself
"hmm why am I a sunflower and so big and lanky( kinda like you niral tehehehe =D) when all my friends and my parents are daisies?"
(by big I meant tall)
but anyways
so she figured out
that the seeds
from the OTHER side
of the pond
must have blown over to the meadow
so she was actually on the wrong side her whole life
which meant that her parents were on the other side
so one day
she decided to go to the other side of the pond
and meet her real parents
so she said bye to all the daisies
and daisy went to the pond and saw a frog
so she said
"oh hello mr frog"
and he said
"ribbit ribbit"
and she said
"can I please have a ride on your lilly pad to the other side of the pond so I can see my sunflower parents because ive been raised by daises my whole life?"
and he said
"ribbit ribbit"
so then she hopped onto his lilly pad
and they were coasting across the pond
and they were in the middle
and then all of a sudden
a huge massive
FISH
comes to the surface for some air
and sees daisy on the lilly pad
and says
"oh hello. I dont usually see sunflowers in the pond.
you look sooo scrumptious
and then he starts smacking his fish lips together
and making awkward smacking sounds
and kinda creeping on her
but clearly he wanted to eat her
so she was like
"please dont eat me"
and he said
ok
and then she made it to the other side of the pond and saw her parents and her parents were actually half sunflower half daises so she was a mixed child so she liked it because she was biracial and could apply for more scholarships
THE END
: D
82 days till summertime
petitebaie:
